So here’s the review, only a week late!
We open to Fanny and Michelle discussing the dance Michelle
choreographed for the Nutcracker, as they go into the dance studio to see
it. Michelle has found a ‘temp’ to fill
in, and surprise! It’s Sasha. The evil rat mouse dance is made to
look like some sort of boardroom, with Kent from SYTYCD(!) as the main
mouse. Fanny loves the dance, and
everyone breathes a sigh of relief.
We cut to Fanny and Michelle having a nice conversation
about the fundraiser Michelle is throwing later in the episode, and then Fanny
drops a juicy tidbit: she found a cabin
for her and Michael in Montana, if Michelle wouldn’t mind taking over for a while. Michelle gladly accepts, and then: SHE comes.
The ringer. This girl
can do ballet in her sleep, and is basically a robot. Fanny forgot to cancel her after Sasha came
back, and basically freaks out. This
girl is terrifying, and no one even knows her name.
We pan to the other girls, and they are busy
passive-agressiveing the ringer. “Guess I should take up typing,” from Melanie,
I think.
They walk into the room, and Michelle walks into the second
coming of the cold war, as all of our main girls are in a fight, which Sasha
eloquently disseminates to Michelle. The
whole Charlie/Carl debacle ends with an: ‘And I wish we were all lesbians.’ Michelle manages to be a grown-up for once,
and gets the girls talking again. She then
sends Sasha down to ask Fanny about the ringer, and she goes in the most
amusing way possible: arms flung back,
chest out, in the epitome of dancer-walk.
So anyway, dancer girl is creepy some more, and Fanny chucks
the mean task of getting rid of the ringer to the one person who could handle
it: Sasha.
As Fanny hightails it out of the room, the ringer turns
Sasha into her own personal barre, and you can just see Sasha shrinking bit by
bit as the conversation goes on, until the ringer has practically made Sasha
want to hand Clara to her.
We then cut to: fundraiser, where everyone is dressed in
costumes, though it’s a bit weird, because they seem to come from about four
different shows, very strange. Boo is
all depressed in her period attire, and Michelle tries to cheer her up, and
convinces her to seeks reconciliation with Carl, who hates her due to the
Charlie thing last week. So Boo does the
obvious thing, which is go to the microphone, and tell everyone in the room how
stupid she was, and that she still really likes Carl. It was very nearly a crash and burn, but got
pulled back at the last minute. Carl
takes her apology, and they dance around to a cover of Rainbow Connection, and
it’s super cute, of course.
We then find Fanny crabby, as she found out that Michael’s
Montana dream was a solo thing, as he bought a piece of land there. And then, everything goes to hell in a hand
basket. Melanie gets grossed out by
Charlie’s gross friend, and as she’s leaving, spooks Ginny, who goes in for a
kiss with Charlie, but manages to split his lip instead. Michelle then tries to ‘help’ Fanny and
Michael, by telling Michael Fanny’s plans.
Sasha runs into random worker, and that was it for her. THEN, Michelle runs into Godot, and he starts
kissing her. She does not protest, as
the whole of the bar watches on.
Fast cut to PISSED OFF Fanny. The only two minority characters in the whole
show are performing a dance, which Fanny declares the most boring dance EVA. We
then move to Ginny discussing Charlie things with a girl we later learn is only
twelve. Fanny is now not impressed with
another dance, and Ginny is discussing actually inappropriate things with the
twelve year old as Charlie pulls up with another girl in his car. So, no more need for Ginny to plan prom
contingencies revolving around when/how/if she should say no to consummating the
relationship, especially with that poor twelve year old.
And suddenly: performance.
Fanny is in some sort of suit, and Michelle has a massive bag of doom,
since obviously nothing good is going to come of ‘pretty mace.’ Ginny and Melanie are mad at each other
again, because apparently Charlie sucking giant monkey balls is Michelle’s
fault, somehow?
The ringer is creepy some more, and then we learn Melanie
almost certainly dated her own cousin once.
And then: performance!
Fanny goes out, and give Sasha/Clara the nutcracker, and the dancing is
really good…so of course, they go backstage, where Michelle manages to mace the
entire troop with her mace, and there is much bumbling, falling, and mass
chaos. Boo and Carl are cute again, some
more, and Michelle tries to fix it by indiscriminately spraying water
everywhere. And the ringer is creepy
again, as usual.
We then move to the hospital, where everyone is miserable,
as is to be expected. Ginny and Melanie
make up over a shared hatred of Charlie.
Sasha and Tyler Roman talk again, and it’s super boring. So we cut to Michelle and Fanny discussing
the maceing, and Fanny is uber pissed.
She revealed Michael left, and Michelle spills that she told Michael
about Fanny’s plan, and that when things hit the fan for the second time in the
episode. Fanny basically says things
have been wrong since Hubble died, and we cut to…
Michelle doing her audition dance again. Sutton Foster’s broadway training really
comes out, and the piece is fan-freaking-tastic. She asks how she did, did they like it?, and
out steps…
Hubble, who was thoroughly impressed. Michelle isn’t surprised by him being there,
and they talk about how Michelle was there to rock the boat, and they walk to
the table in Fanny’s living room, filled with broken frogs, except four, and
then our four main girls are dancing behind them in silhouette, with Michelle
wondering if she would have stayed as quietly, but louder and louder, parents
are yelling.
Michelle wakes up and realizes what she has to do. She purposefully walks out the door, to the
hallway, where most of the girls are sitting, and the parents are yelling in
the background. Michelle continues out the
hospital door, as the girls make a last ditch effort, standing on chairs and
calling out ‘Oh Captain my Captain.’ Michelle has to remind them that the teacher
leaves in the end anyway, as she tearfully walks out the door.
And that’s it for the summer season! Bunheads has been picked up for at least
eight more episodes, so I’ll have more from the girls in January!
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