Oh, my goodness. I am
seething right now, and it’s not even because I failed miserably at both the
shoulds and the wills. I’ll get to the
reason why in just a bit.
First off, we have a bit of a procedure change for these
semi-final rounds: the top four acts
will be spotlighted, but only three will actually go on. The top two vote getters, and then a judges
pick.
Let’s get right down to it.
First off, we had Turf,
Joe Castillo, and The Scott
Brothers. It was fairly obvious who was going through in this group. Turf and the Scott Brothers did not do what
they needed to, and Joe Castillo and his stupid knowing grin can suck it.
 |
| Kitter says: Don't be a douche! |
Ok then.
Next, we had Andrew
DeLeon, William Close, and Academy
of Villains. Again, the choice was obvious, if William Close didn’t make it
through, there would have been riots on the streets, booing in the audience,
and a shoe or four through my TV. But
luckily, we didn’t have to resort to that, and William Close is in the top
four.
Next, we had a grouping that was actually tricky to
decide. Donovan and Rebecca, Todd Oliver, and Edon were next. Edon had the
sad face of ‘I know I already lost, please don’t drag this out any further,’
but the other two were much more anxious.
I was pulling for Todd Oliver, and he pulled through! I was so glad he was in the top four, but I
really worried about his chances with the other groups.
Lastly, we had Dittelman,
Bria Kelly, and Tom Cotter. Again, this was a two way race, and Bria
Kelly in her ugly dress knew it. I was
pulling for Dittelman, just because I enjoy the illusions more than the rapid
fire double meanings. But Tom Cotter
beat my man out, and we have our top four.
All four acts then made their way to the stage, and Nick did
his usual drama wait, in order to tell us that William Close was in the top
two. They didn’t mention if he was in
first or not, but I’m assuming he was.
We then went on to the remaining guys, and *dramatic pause* Tom Cotter
was also in the final! That left Todd
Oliver and Joe Castillo.
Nick asked the guys why they should move on:
Todd: “People seem to like us, and we have nowhere to go but up!”
Joe: “I’m a major douche face, and everyone should bask in
the glow of my amazing uniqueness that totally wasn’t stolen from a woman in
Ukraine or anything! Also: why would you
see a [funny]ventriloquist over someone that plays in dirt creates beautiful[lly
pretentious] pieces of art, amirite?”
Yes, my enjoyment of his act HAS been diminished by his
entitled, pretentious douchyness, why do you ask?
The judges vote, and Howard sets the voice of reason: “Todd’s act can grow, and go places we haven’t
seen, Joe’s act has probably hit a plateau.”
I was then in for the biggest shock of my life, as Sharon
didn’t vote for the animal act! WHAAT???
It was down to Howie, and both judges tried to influence
him, and somehow, Sharon won out, and Howie put through doucheface, probably to
spite me.
Anyway, my should and wills are both sitting at 1/3, so go
me!
Next week, a much weaker field, and three singers. I’m hoping for the shut out again, so we can
have a singer free finale.
Who’s with me?!
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