It’s a good thing the songs are usually fun on this show, cause it has no basis in reality.
In overarcing story news, The Warblers are disqualified for drug abuse, and the news lady that reported the news went stormed out of the newsroom over the fact that this was apparently news-worthy in the first place.
In the main plot arc of the episode, Tina has an idea to raise the money to get to regionals: a ‘Men of McKinley’ calendar! But to make it Glee worthy, it’s a sexy calendar, with as few clothes as possible. Because that would totally fly in a HIGH SCHOOL SETTING, SHOW.
ANYway, sans clothes is the theme for the whole episode. To start, we turn to Sam, who has managed to score a 340 on the SAT, which is…not even possible, so good research there, show. The lowest possible score is 600, in case you were wondering. This leads him to some major soul-searching, and Sam realizes that his major asset is his body, and so he decides to mentor all the guys on how to look exceptionally hot for the calendar. Sam turns into a major diva, even storming out of the calendar photo shoot in a diva rage. Finally, Blaine talks some sense into him, reminding him via video how awesome every thinks he is, and that there are colleges that don’t require good grades.
In grown-up news, Finn is still pretending to be one, and almost drinks a cup of coffee before Sue walks in and threatens to kill the calendar. Finn, though, has an ace up his sleeve: Sue posing naked for penthouse in the 70’s. Sue denies the accusation, of course, but Finn takes the challenge, and…tricks Sue into confessing on tape, thereby cementing the calendar’s existence.
Apparently, Artie now barely rates c-plot status, and so we get all of three scenes with him. First, he is not impressed with the idea of going shirtless for the calendar, since he’s more PBS than CW, which…yeah. Then, we see him talking to Finn pulling out from the calendar. Finally, when Sam is done being a diva, he gets Artie to be in the calendar again. The end. Poor Artie.
In boring love story news, Britany invites Marley over for Fondue for Two, and asks her if she loves Jake. Marley demurs, but Britany insists she needs to expose herself if she wants her relationship to be real or something. What this means for us is we get an entire episode of Marley trying to tell Jake, a guy she has been dating for all of a month, that she loves him. They finally do, and Becky tells them what everyone wants to: “Get a room!”
Finally, in annoying Rachel plot, she’s been asked to be in a fellow student’s senior thesis film. And in case you weren’t aware of the theme yet, she needs to get NAKED! Episode title, ZOMG! She has a debate with herself(in the actually well used ‘Torn”), and decides that she will be a part of it. Brody is all for it, and shows his support by walking around the apartment naked. With Kurt there. Who is NOT okay with it. Kurt calls back-up in Santana and Quinn, and they have an intervention for Rachel, but she decides to go for it anyway.
She gets to the studio, and can’t manage to drop robe, even after she makes all the creepy crew guys disrobe to make her more comfortable. She leaves, and then duets with her girls to celebrate.
I really don’t think the writers and set designers of this show have a grip on reality. I really enjoyed the songs this episode, but the completely unrealistic story elements completely took me out of the scenes, when it wasn’t putting me to sleep. Oh, and side note: I find it hilarious that Matthew Morrison still gets first billing even though we haven’t seen him in six episodes.
“Torn” as sung by Rachel(s)
“A Thousand Years” as sung by Marley and Jake
“Let Me Love You” as sung by Jake
“Love Story” as sung by Rachel, Quinn and Santana
“This is the New Year” as sung by everyone